Real questions. Unreal answers.

5/21/09

Dear Ask Boz,

Is the universe finite or infinite?
Taylor, Seattle

Dear Taylor,

Infinite. Here's why:

We all know that for the universe to be finite, it would have to have limits. But the natural question to ask is "what's outside those limits?"

The only possible answer is "Nothing." Logically, for the universe to end, their can't be anything else outside of it, because that would still be the universe. Because the universe, by definition, includes everything there is.

So here's the problem. Nothing means there isn't anything there. Nada. No material, no light, no souls, no cats, no fried chicken. Time stops. No porn.

Think about it. Nothing has no substance, no existence in any form. You don't count forward to zero. You don't get the tape measure out of the closet to measure a little nothing. You never ask "What time is it?" and have someone say "Nothing." Unless you hang with druggies, or Buddhists.

Nothing is NOTHING. So it can't stop the universe because it isn't there.

Since nothing doesn't count then the universe can have no border. If there can't be limits, there can't be a beginning or end, so the universe is infinite.

And don't give me any of that "parallel universe, alternate dimension" crap, either. That would all be part of the whole, thus the universe, thus infinite. So cut it out!

If anyone tells you differently, tell them I'm right and they're wrong. Then step on their foot hard and bark "NO!" That'll learn 'em about infinity, real good.

Yours,

Boz


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