Meatloaf sang "I would do anything for love, but I won't do that". What's that? -Sierra

You don't have to be in the Ask Boz Institute Meatloaf wing, sitting at one of the dashboard tables, to answer this one. The reason behind this lyric comes from those two horrifying words: "woman" and "vegan." That's right, some arugala-stink hippy chick got her feminine tentacles into Meatloaf, and demanded the singer "veggie up" his name. Her suggestions of "Tofuloaf, Bocaloaf, and Loamyloaf" were met with hostile belches from the Meatmaster. To be truthful, our studies suggest his frown turned briefly upside down at her idea of "Old Dirty Loaf." Despite the fact he hated all of her ideas for new names, he was completely under her smelly, rotten-broccoli spell, and agreed to change his famous moniker.

Of course, the wretch rejected his two attempts to appease her. "Meatloaf is Murder," was just "too meaty" and "too murdery," not to mention the fact that she said "is" is overused. She then rejected the left field attempt "Steampipe" because "vapor kills water."

Finally, just as he was about to agree to "Veggiekosherfoodproductloaf," a friend took him to the side. She said "Any lover that would tell you to change your fleshy, double-entendre name to a flaccid, stinko, vegan name isn't really your lover, she is just a smelly hippy." Needless to say, this advice gave Meatloaf clarity. He planted the Vegan in that field called "Break-up Acres" and turned his home studio into a slaughter-house. The bleak, final bleatings of the cut and bleeding cows soon had the 'Loaf singing "I got my meat back." Still interested in recycling despite his run in with dietary and femaletary evils, he felt compassionate as he was composing his songs in cow blood. One, of course, was the great "I would slaughter anything for love, but I won't slaughter that," From Bat out of Hell 7: Why does that bat keep going back into Hell?"

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